I've had conversations with black women about how our "attitudes" towards being mistreatreated, may cause people that don't understand our struggles to label us as "Angry Black Women". Those kinds of labels can be detrimental to our careers. So, we grin and bear it. We pick ourselves up by the boot straps. And, we pretend that everything is fine when all we want to do it is scream.
In my close to 40 years of life (Shhh, I'm still 18 in my mind) I've found that I know a little bit about a little bit not a lot about a lot, but what I do know I try to know it well. You can't (maybe you can) imagine how many times I've had to smile when I've wanted to scream, wanted to cry, or wanted to cuss.
My co-workers to date, bless their hearts have no idea of who the angered me is. I had one tell me once that she could not imagine me being upset because I've always had an upbeat attitude about everything. I smiled at her and immediately thought of my husband who would definitely beg to differ. You see who I am at work is who I'm pretending to be so that I'm not frowned upon in the work place. I joke around outside of my 9 to 5 with my friends and family that know me most, that my customer service voice has a PhD. It's true. I've mastered the art of turning my customer service voice and my "normal" voice on and off like a flick of switch. I don't know how I'm able to transcend between the two, but I do. I'm not a fan of being labeled because with labels come consequences. I have seen the most professional of women lose their cool just once and the effects of that loss of cool branded them hostile, difficult to work with, or just plain rude. Some were, but most weren't. Because I am a black woman myself I was able to relate to their frustrations and I understood that it wasn't anger that they were displaying but an irritation that bubbled over.
For most of us it's not anger that you see. It's fear, it's sadness, and it's the pain of being stretched too thin. It's a "normal" emotion that deserves NOT to be correlated to 'only' black women. Everyone is warranted an off day or two so let's dismantle the stereotype of the "Angry Black Woman" and replace it with SHE is a strong willed and powerful WOMAN that just had an overwhelming day.
Author Janice Gassam Asare so eloquently leaves us with three important ways to overcome the angry black woman stereotype in the workplace.
Educate yourself
Express yourself
Check yourself
Read More here: Overcoming The Angry Black Woman Stereotype